It’s true…after graduating I felt like my life was wondering with no direction.
Now, I am back to my old busy self…the workaholic..the I wanna change the world super man mentality which to be honest…I thought I left when I graduated.
The real world really is different…I am just blessed to have been given the opportunity and to have people who believe in me. I THINK THINGS JUST ALIGNED AND MY LIFE JUST WORKED OUT…It’s like I am in a movie, given a few adjustment here and there..this would have been the perfect movie.. OH WELL YOU CAN’T HAVE ERRTHANG YOU WANT. Just be grateful for what you have but it doesn’t mean you should settle..ALWAYS FIGHT FOR WHAT YOU DESERVE-what ever that maybe.
Ever since I “grew up” , Christmas hasn’t been as magical as it used to. As a kid, I always look forward to Christmas time. I dunno what about presents, carols,and feast is so magical. …..That was my childhood in the Philippines…I felt like my American Christmas was just full of : here’s your gift and generic greetings…The magic disappeared. Now Christmas is just a regular day except I get a gift…maybe the magic will be sparked again if or when I find a special person..but for now…Christmas has became mundane …I only look forward to the vacation and the family time..then again Christmas is really about spending time with your loved ones even though they drive you nuts. But Christmas isn’t as merry as it used to be yet it is still a happy holiday because of all the blessings that I have and the time I get to have with the fams.
So today, APALC’s Executive Director, Stewart Kwoh spoke at the intern mixer that I attended. It was a humbling experience because he mentioned how I coordinated the Community Forum the night before and how it was successful. I felt a little embarrassed being put in the lime light like that. But it definitely affirms the work that I do and really make me realize that I do it because I want to make a change for the love of my community. I have a little less than 2 weeks to rest up a little till the madness becomes chaos. BRING IT ON.
So today, I went to a mixer with other interns in different organizations in LA. I was partnered with 2 college folks, one from UCLA and one from USC. The student from UCLA asks me if I was for affirmative action. Ofcourse, my answer was a firm, YEAH! Then she replies back, “We’ll I think, it’s bad for us.” The USC student nodded in agreement. This definitely shocked me because I thought they would be progressive and alot more knowledgeable of different issues in the API community given that they work in a non-profit. Of course I had to educate her about educational disparities in certain API communities. I know she just said, “I understand what you mean” just to stop the conversation and of course I tried to be nice and deviate from that topic. Atelast I was able to provide an insight, hopefully they both reconsider their stance on it.
On a personal note. The fact that you are able to access higher education and see that API’s in higher institutions of learning doesn’t mean that affirmative action is no longer valid and that only Latino, Blacks, Native Americans, and other communities are the only ones to reap benefit from it. You should realize that your being here has roots in the implementation of affirmative action. You need to realize that the model minority myth has been institutionalized in society and institutions like higher education. It is our job to look at these institutions in a critical way and intervene in ways we can. We do this for ourselves, our communities,and our family members who wish to pursue higher education.
I learned not to be so constricted to my plans, I need to be more flexible. With that being said, the idea of going to law school just became a viable option again. It was an option I closed after taking an upper division law undergrad class. I guess that door was meant to be open at another time. I actually did some quick search of public interest programs. I’ve already found a program that has a joint JD/MA in Higher Ed program. We’ll see what happens. I am feeling so blessed right now with everything going on in my life. My future just keeps getting brighter and brighter.
So I just finished my first week of my internship at APALC. Man, was it a crazy week. I didn’t expect to get to work that quick. I thought I would be feeling the environment , the institution,and familiarizing my self with the culture for the first few days. With everything that happened on the week of June 15, I actually expected to be put on work immediately. Honestly, I LOVED EVERY SINGLE MINUTE OF IT. I love being busy, feeling productive, going to back to back meetings, etc. I had to really work quick and adapt quickly. More than anything, I don’t feel like an intern, I feel like I am part of the staff. I got my email account and access card, I feel pretty cool. The environment is very dynamic and chill. I LOVE THE STAFF. Everyone is nice and very progressive. Can I just say how amazing my supervisor is!!!! She’s an awesome mentor. Although she is hands off, I feel that she still guides me, in many ways. THIS HAS TO BE THE BEST INTERNSHIP I HAD——EVER!!! 9 MORE WEEKS OF AMAZING WORK IN THIS PROGRAM! I think the thing I love the most is that fact that my experience as a student leader, a Kaba Board member, and my love of Asian American studies all come together to help me do my work. All the things that I did helped me in my work—-NO LIE! The way I do work, the ability to multitask, and the ability to be critical came from being a student of color leader as well as taking interdisciplinary courses. I AM JUST ENAMORED RIGHT NOW. Everybody keeps telling me that I came at the perfect time and to be honest, I AGREE. I feel so validated too when it came to my skills and abilities, I get hella good compliments from alot of the staff and it makes me kinda blush and feel good on the inside. I just try not to think cocky thoughts and try to make sure I am grounded.
Identity development is never linear. It has it’s ups and downs, you just gotta enjoy the journey.
So yesterday was the last day of the orientation. We had amazing speakers talk to us about civil rights, human rights, and immigration rights movement. It was really inspiring to be called leaders in the immigrant youth movement, it is both humbling and breath taking. It was more than an honor to met all those amazing DREAMers, 140+ doing this program this summer. We are going to rock our internship and agitate the status quo. This training especially yesterday got me more pumped than ever. I love my placement and the people I am going to work with, they are hella progressive people. :]
So today, alot of amazing things happened. In the morning we found out that Obama planned to announce administrative relief for undocumented students. It just aligned with our action today! Then later that morning, pacific time, Obama had a press conference referring to this admin relief, a memo was send to ICE, Homeland Security, and CIS. It was a day filled with emotions, DREAMers from early and current generation expressed their joy for this news. The day got better when Kent Wong announced news that made the DREAM Summer program better than I expected. :] Today was alot of self reflecting and looking into the future!
Today I was in the presence of greatness. I met 100+ amazing individuals who are key to the immigrant youth movement. I met one of Time Magazine’s 100 most influential people. I was inspired by all of them to do what I do and to keep reaffirming my work. I do what I do for my love of my community, for my love of my people, and for my love for social justice. I believe in equality for all! I can’t wait to practice all the theories I learned in community organizing.From student leader to a community organizer, I definitely didn’t see that coming. Life has a interesting way to keep you on your toes and to maintain your passion.
Date #4..Late night grub at El Torrito. Definitely a good night.
I believe in making my own luck, that’s why I decided to not give up and fight for you. I may not be the luckiest person when it comes to love. But I like you way too much to not give it my all. I know I am gambling alot but I am willing to put my self out there again and spare the chance of getting hurt. Here’s to taking things slow and getting to know each other. :]
I got this photo text[duh i had to crop the pic]..and omg..I almost died haha..it feels good to feel this weird feeling again LOL
I don’t know if I’m feeling paranoid or it’s just a gut feeling. But I feel like things aren’t the same anymore…I really want to know. I hate being caught off guard especially when it’s preventable. I can adapt to situations particularly when it comes to work but it’s a different story when it’s personal and hits close to home. All I want to know is….Are we okay? This kind of thing doesn’t happen to me often so I feel that I am extra attentive and careful but I did slip up…I think. I know I have a hard time of letting things go but all that means is I really care.